Dance, Floss, Travel

beautiful music, beautiful dancing ;

2011-09-09T19:25:00.003+08:00

Polina Semionova, principal dancer of the American Ballet Theatre

Where are you?

2011-01-26T18:39:00.002+08:00

God where are you?
I've been faithfully doing all i can to develop the talents you have given me, take care of the responsibilities you have blessed with me.
Stay back everyday single day in school to train, cheerlead until my knuckles bleed, my muscles hurt, im so fatigued, every morning i wished i didnt have to get out of bed, but i still do, to carry out my duties. i listen in class so that i dont have to waste money taking tuition, but God where are you?
Isnt that enough?

It was just rain, God.
Why didnt you stop it for me?
Instead it got heavier.
You knew how heavy my bag was
You knew i was holding my laptop in my hands
You knew my hands were already hurting
but still the bus came so late,
the rain got heavier
and i had to scratch my hand again taking my keys
God where are you?
Where are you when I need you?

2010-10-11T21:03:00.002+08:00

So i decided to post again. sorry blog, you've missed out alot.

11.10.10

4 months <3

2010-04-12T20:12:00.001+08:00

Let this go on, oh Lord.
because you are amazing.
seeing you work, touches my heart.
I love you.

2010-03-18T16:09:00.001+08:00

sick of EVERYTHING

My private movie

2010-02-21T17:37:00.001+08:00

Pretty girls are all around
I'm looking up and down
'Till my view finder fins you in the sands
Zoom in 'til you fill the frame
You're driving me insane
And the way you're acting's telling me
You feel the same

Everything you do everything I see
The sunlight on your body is working for me
Take after take
Watching every move you make
There's only one thing that's missing

Picture me all over you
Picture you all over me
Baby you're that star in my private movie
You stealing the love scene
Right out of my dream
We see the sun come up
The violins are playing
Girl we're making love
In my private movie

Cut to a desert isle
Surrounded by the deep blue sea
Fade to a picture of your lips kissing me
Waves are crashing as out loves runs free
Let the rhythm take us from here to eternity

Oh baby can we make this real
Autograph my heart
'Cause you know how I feel
(Let me know how you feel)
'Cause you know it's true girl
You're me fantasy
There's only one thing missing

Since I saw your face
I've never been the same
Now it's only you I think of
Slow motion frame by frame

Picture me all over you
Picture you all over me
Baby you're the star

I never knew

2010-02-21T17:27:00.001+08:00

I'm feeling so alone now tonight
Even though you're here by my side
Is there something on your mind
From the world you'd left behind

I feel as if the loved shared before
Doesn't wanna be here no more
And if there's something on your mind
There's never been a better time
To tell me

Do you love me
Still wanting me
Like I need you, oh

There came a crossing on the road
If only there were signs to show me
Which direction I should go
I live my life with no regrets
It hasn't caught up on me yet
But I never knew I was losing you

I wonder as you walk through the door
Are you gonna hurt me some more
Never took you for the kind
Who would play up on my mind

Tell me what are you looking for
I can't play your games anymore
And when there's something on my mind
I will always find the time
To tell you

I still love you
Still wanting you
How I need you, oh

There came a crossing on the road
If only there were signs to show me
Which direction I should go
I live my life with no regrets
It hasn't caught up on me yet
Well I never knew I was losing you
Losing you

It's not for the first time
That someone else has hurt me
By faking it too long
Where did we go wrong, yeah

There came a crossing on the road
If only there were signs to show me
Which direction I should go
I live my life with no regrets
It hasn't caught up on me yet
Well I never knew I was losing you

There came a crossing on the road
If only there were signs to show me
Which direction I should go
I live my life with no regrets
It hasn't caught up on me yet
Well I never knew I was losing you
Losing you

Never Knew I Was Losing You - Westlife

please follow the link.

2010-02-17T17:41:00.000+08:00

http://link.brightcove.com/services/player/bcpid1274025877?bclid=1184431637&bctid=65583484001

pray for them =)
they need it.

Westlife

2010-02-17T13:54:00.003+08:00

Westlife

Posted using ShareThis

Westlife

2010-02-17T13:54:00.001+08:00

Westlife

Posted using ShareThis

why I love chinese new year (even though mine sucks)

2010-02-15T00:50:00.000+08:00

i dont know how to say this in pretty words like all the pendahuluan and stuffs. im jsut gonna cut straight to the point.

the difference between the english new year and the lunar new year.
whats the difference?

english new year, we normally spend it with friends, out in the daytime, back not before 3 am.
chinese new year. the year is ended with family, FAMILY reunion. cousins, aunties, uncles, grandparents, nephews, neices, etc, all meeting together, all eating together. untill pass 12, the new year starts. also with family. as the saying goes, blood runs thicker than water.
its just amazing how this tradition runs, of ending and starting the new year with family.

another one is, first day of new year, ang paos given out. the year is started out with BLESSING OTHERS. not all those "new year present for myself" crapped shits. chinese new year, its started out with BLESSING OTHERS. blessing others no matter how poor you are. wow. isnt it?

i know it sounds suckish but my brain is asleep.

the feeling of doing something even though you know its wrong ;

2010-02-06T00:13:00.001+08:00

http://www.youtube.com/comment_servlet?all_comments&v=034_40V3sJQ&fromurl=/watch%3Fv%3D034_40V3sJQ

2010-02-03T23:36:00.001+08:00

quote meichelle ;
I know ppl might think you're crazy when you say this. Its really a real thing. Apperciate bfore you lost it. When you taught you might lost someone, When you taught you might not meet her again, When you think all the memories you had, No matter how far you're, you'll be there to ensure she is alright. No matter how strong you're, you'll cry. No matter how much sins she did, you'll say "i'll forgive her just to ensure she is safe.". No matter how you all have fight how you hates her, you'll still iloveyou. Be with me nowww. There is only our feelings when we walked to the place. Trying to be strong but it was hard to be one. Trying our best to be with her, she is fighting with all those pain. But how sweet will it be if she know there is friend outside waiting

wednesday 03.02.2010

2010-02-03T23:28:00.002+08:00

monday ; pek chek with computer
tuesday ; pek chek with the girl that apparently isnt a girl
wednesday ; pek chek with mom. go school, wait ages for locker gate to open. walao. go take books, go class start rush seni. do do do do do. wahh. PEK CHEK. sim tia. everything cham cham. but ok la sometimes. after school went out, started pek chek again. i think its more of HURT. no money for lunch some more. IMAGINE. walao.cried all the way walking home. come in, cry some more, bathe sleep, wake up, facebooked, cried again. mummy came back. lecture me again, say why i takda mood at home. PLEASE LA. i outside have to put up the happy front, home is the only time i can show my feelings, so please la. and its like she expect me to be happy always. TEENAGERS GOT NO HORMONES IS IT. say sorry d summore say i not sincere. wtf la seriously.

*Click to view.

2010-02-03T23:12:00.001+08:00

Don't make me go through this again

2010-01-27T00:04:00.001+08:00

talk about a freaky experience.
i can still feel it now. the panic. the uncertainty. the fear.

haven't dont this in a while

2010-01-21T23:32:00.002+08:00

update. haha.
3rd week of school. um. school is awesome. um tuesday, Wei came to school WHOOOOTs. SAME CLASS WEIH. SAME CLASS. LOVEs her loads. even though she's still very quiet now. haha gives her time =)

i dont know what to say d la. stay back in school everyday. walk here walk there. um. merentas desa to morrow. dunno la.

friends have problems. but this problems are the ones that build up your friendship =) ever wondered how come im so close to my sis. and i can actually miss her at camp? coz we fight ALOT

♥ Sound of a broken heart

2010-01-21T05:30:00.001+08:00

walao everyday must ask, later how we going home ar?
siao meh.

how can one song say so much ♥

2010-01-20T20:09:00.001+08:00

♥ Sound of a broken heart

And the pain isn't over ; I keep getting stronger ; Sound of a broken heart

2010-01-20T19:54:00.004+08:00

In so many ways I tried to reach you
And I don’t know why I couldn’t get through
When I tried so hard to break your guard
Didn’t know it would leave this scar
Leave this scar

Now I’ve made it this far
And the pain isn’t over
But the sun keeps on risin’
And I keep getting stronger

I never thought that I’d survive you
But I will be free
And there’ll be so many nights I gotta get through
But now I see
You’ll never be the end of me (no)
Cos when my world fell apart
And I didn’t know where to start
I heard the sound of a broken heart
(I still feel the pain)
I heard the sound of a broken heart
(It still beats the same)

When will the world start spinnin’
And what happened to my happy ending
Learning what it takes, to turn this page
Didn’t know how to walk away
Walk away

Now I’ve made it this far
And the pain isn’t over
But the sun keeps on risin’
And I keep getting stronger

I never thought that I’d survive you
But I will be free
And there’ll be so many nights I gotta get through
But now I see
You’ll never be the end of me (no)
Cos when my world fell apart
And I didn’t know where to start
I heard the sound of a broken heart
(I still feel the pain)
I heard the sound of a broken heart
(It still beats the same)

And I won’t stay down; I know my heart’s still beating
Cos I hear the sound, tellin’ me I’m alright
Tellin’ me to move on

I never thought that I’d survive you
But I will be free
And there’ll be so many nights I gotta get through
But now I see
You’ll never be the end of me (no)
Cos when my world fell apart
And I didn’t know where to start
I heard the sound of a broken heart
(I still feel the pain)
I heard the sound of a broken heart
(It still beats the same)

Still feel the pain for you
Still beats the same x 2

The difference

2010-01-18T22:49:00.001+08:00

I wake my faith shaken inside
Images of you race to mind
Did I forget I meant to tell you something?
Only half 'til you have to fall
Only whole when you’re seeing it all
Oh you saved for something me

Between lost and found
You showed me the difference
Between safe and sound
You showed me the distance
Oh I was sliding, safe but I was hiding out
Oh I fell I’m not down
You showed me the difference

Everything was slipping right through my hands
Hard to find any place to land
Clouds don’t cover me where I stand anymore
Only half 'til you think you lost
Only whole when you’re reaching across
You saved something for me

Between lost and found
You showed me the difference
Between safe and sound
You showed me the distance
Oh I was sliding, safe but I was hiding out
Oh I fell I’m not down
You showed me the difference

You resurrected me
Eyes wide open to dream
In scattered pieces when you found me

Between lost and found
You showed me the difference
Between safe and sound
You showed me the distance
Oh I was sliding, safe but I was hiding out
Oh I fell I’m not down
You showed me the difference

You showed me the difference
You showed me the difference

Close your eyes

2010-01-18T21:03:00.001+08:00

If you wanna know
Tomorrow morning I have to leave
But wherever I may be
Best believe I'm thinking of you
I can't believe how much I love

All we have is here tonight
We don't want to waste this time
Give me something to remember
Baby put your lips on mine

And I'll love you forever
Anytime that we find ourselves apart

Just close your eyes
And you'll be here with me
Just look to your heart
And that's where I'll be
If you just close your eyes
Till your drifting away
You'll never be too far from me
If you close your eyes

I know I'm gonna see you again
But promise me that you won't forget
Cause as long as you remember
A part of us will be together
So even when you're fast asleep
Look for me inside your dreams
Keep believing in what we're sharing
And even when I'm not there to tell you

I'll, I'll love you forever
Anytime that I can't be where you are

[Chorus]

Is there anywhere that far?
Anytime you're feeling low
Is there anywhere that love cannot reach?
Oh no
It could be anywhere on earth
It could be anywhere I'll be
Oh baby if you want to see

Just close your eyes
And you'll be here with me
Look to your heart
That's where you'll be
Just close your eyes
Till your drifting away
You'll never be too far from me

wonders ;

2010-01-13T22:29:00.003+08:00

does moving on require GETTING RID of all things old, all things that remind me of?

`but it hurt so bad, I can't take it any longer

New Year's Resolution de Sarah

2010-01-09T23:38:00.000+08:00

No online-ing on saturday nights after youth.

vern sern

2010-01-08T15:20:00.001+08:00

thanks for lending me ps2. dont worry, i will take care of it well =D

2010-01-08T15:17:00.001+08:00

thanks to all who wished me, all you sweet ppl!

22 hours and 30 minutes to go

2010-01-07T00:09:00.000+08:00

and...still counting.

3 days to go

2010-01-04T05:55:00.001+08:00

and counting.

2010

2010-01-03T23:45:00.000+08:00

eh, gotta wake up early wan ar?
walao. i didnt know.

2009 summary of event and happenings;

2009-12-30T16:19:00.000+08:00

HAH. trust me to remember everything that happened. =.=

Breathe ;

2009-12-30T15:29:00.000+08:00

We were still in high school
When I first met you
Even then you were the prettiest girl
That I ever knew
And we carved our name on
Everything that we could find
The way that all kids do
And although time has passed
I still get surprised
At the pulling in my chest
When I know you're coming by
If this feeling's proving anything
It's not everything
Is gonna change with time
You're still mine

Did you know when you're around
My heart won't it can't slow down
It beats so hard it makes it hard
To catch my breath, to catch my breath

Don't ever ask me if I'm sorry
Or that I'm here with you
Baby you can bet
I don't regret the girls I never knew
Every day's another first
Another change for me
To fall in love with you
And I do:

Did you know when you're around
My heart won't it can't slow down
It beats so hard it makes it hard
To catch my breath, to catch my breath

Oh.. when you're with me
I stop seeing
Any way to fail how do I explain
I try to tell you what I'm feeling
But how do I when all words pale

Did you know when you're around
My heart won't, it can't slow down
It beats so hard it makes it hard
To catch my breath, to catch my breath

Did you know when you're around
My heart won't, it can't slow down
It beats so hard it makes it hard

To catch my breath, to catch my breath
To catch my breath, to catch my breath
To catch my breath, to catch my breath

See I'm not into

2009-12-27T01:51:00.001+08:00

Listen girl
Just let me talk to you
I just wanna be with you
So why should i play it cool
You and me, We got a chemistry
So i dont need poetry to say what ya mean to me

See im not into buying your affections
With a diamond on a necklace
Theres a realer way to do it girl
I dont need to throw you all these lines
Just so you know I know your fine im gonna come right out and say it girl

I love you, I love you
Whats wrong with saying it the easy way
I love you, I love you
Whats wrong with saying it the easy way

Pretty girl i dont wanna play no more
Been there done that before
I've never been so sure
About what i feel
Lets get it on for real
Why should i hold it back
When all i wanna say is that

See im not into buying your affections
With a diamond on a necklace
Theres a realer way to do it girl
I spend all the time i have with you
I never treat you bad
Aint that enough to show you
That you are my world

I love you, I love you
Whats wrong with saying it the easy way
I love you, I love you
Whats wrong with saying it the easy way

Ohhhhhhh i love you, I love you the easy way
I Love you ... (Yeah Yeah Yeah)

See im not into buying your affections
With a diamond on a necklace
Theres a realer way to do it girl
I spend all the time i have with you
I never treat you bad
Aint that enough to show you
That you are my world

I love you, I love you
Whats wrong with saying it the easy way
I love you, I love you
Whats wrong with saying it the easy way
I love you, I love you
Whats wrong with saying it the easy way
I love you, I love you
Whats wrong with saying it the easy way

I love you . . . The easy way

A little magic

2009-12-27T01:46:00.002+08:00

To kiss and tell, it's just not my style.
But the night is young, and it's been awhile and she broke my heart, broke it right in two,
and it took some time but I'm feelin' like I'm finally ready to find, find somebody new

I wanna kiss a girl
I wanna hold her tight
Maybe make a little magic in the moonlight
Don't wanna go too far just to take it slow
But I shouldn't be lonely in this big old world
I wanna kiss a girl

It's that moment when you start closin' in
First you're holding back, then surrenderin'
It can start a fire, light up the sky, such a simple thing.
Do you wanna try?
Are you ready to say good-bye to all these blues?

I wanna kiss a girl
I wanna hold her tight
Maybe make a little magic in the moonlight
Don't wanna go too far just to take it slow
But I shouldn't be lonely in this big old world
I wanna kiss a girl

'Cause maybe tonight it could turn into the rest of our lives, oh yeah.
Are you ready? Are you ready..to cross that line, put your lips on mine??

(Put your lips on mine baby)

Do you wanna try?
Are you ready to say good-bye to all these blues?

I wanna kiss a girl
I wanna hold her tight
Maybe make a little magic baby
Don't wanna go too far just to take it slow
But no one should be lonely, I shouldn't be lonely

How to break a heart

2009-12-23T02:56:00.003+08:00

Since you're not worth my love
I haven't given up
I'm stronger than that
(I'm stronger than that)
And though my heart will break
I'm takin' back my faith
Cos right now my world is spinnin' too fast
But you won't be the end of me
If you were the one you wouldn't hurt me so bad
You gave me the world

Gave me the world to take it all away
All you left me was yesterday
And this space in my heart
Now it's slowly tearin' me apart
I'm takin' all that I learned from you
I'll make it something I'll never do
I can't be who you are
You taught me how to break a heart x 2

I'll make it through this pain
My dreams won't call your name
I'm stronger than that
(I'm stronger than that)
Cos I still know how to love
Know that will be enough
And this moment will fade into the past
You won't be the end of me
If you were the one you wouldn't hurt me so bad
You gave me the world

I'm takin' all that I learned from you
I'll make it something I'll never do
I can't be who you are
You taught me how to break a heart x 2

I'm taking back my faith
I'm taking back my life
I don't care for who you are
Cos you taught me how to break a heart
How to break a heart
How to break a heart
Cos you taught me how to break a heart

-Westlife

Shadows

2009-12-23T02:53:00.001+08:00

Mornings after
Still lingers
Just waking up
I see a shadow of you
Making breakfast for two
I go driving
Past our place and
I see this girl walk by
I smell her perfume
For a moment I wish it was you
I'm not gonna tell ya
I'm not gonna say that I'm okay, no
I'm tryin' to get over
I'm tryin' to get far away from our mistakes

But I see shadows
Everywhere that I go
It's you, reminding me
Of how we were
Of how it was
I see shadows
Everywhere they follow
It's you and memories
Of how we loved
I've had enough of your shadows

Four months gone
I can't feel you
I don't understand it
Where did you go?
I hate that you're all that I know
I'm not gonna tell ya
I'm not gonna say that I'm okay, no
I'm tryin to get over
I'm tryin' to get far away from our mistakes

You couldn't love me
So why won't you leave me
Shadows
Alone is the only place I want to be

I see shadows
Everywhere that I go
It's you, reminding me
Of how to love
I've had enough
I see shadows
Everywhere they follow
It's you, the memories
Of how we loved
I've had enough

Your shadows
It's you, the memories
Of how we loved
I've had enough of your shadows
Your shadows

-Westlife

Looking up at the stars, the peaceful night sky whispering to me.

2009-12-21T02:34:00.003+08:00

Operation LOOK FOR THE 'SOH EE' in action

eeeeeeeeeeeekkkk. PAUSE!

Go outside your house right now, and look up into the sky. Look at how clear it is, wink back at the twinkling stars glowing in the black night sky, and think of all the things God has blessed you with =)

no, seriously, i mean it. look up in the sky tonight. its clear. no clouds. just stars. go outside your house, lie down, and its just you and the stars. then i am surely thinking of you coz you believed me when i said ITS A CLEAR NIGHT SKY TONIGHT. -.-

Look up, love, and when you see the stars glowing in the clear night sky, remember: you're always on my mind.

Still cant find the soh ee. MUMMMYYY!

what does it all matter?

2009-12-21T02:17:00.001+08:00

Operation GET LOST 101 activated.

i LOVE packing ; NOT!

2009-12-14T02:20:00.003+08:00

lastes minute packing i ever done. 11.45 pm then only i started wanna wash last minute clothes. sweat. pack until now. still not done. titi sms3. 5 days no handphone. cannot die la, but then just cannot contact ppl lo. =S

7th - 11th Dec

2009-12-12T02:19:00.002+08:00

monday : went out with ema, met derek and benjamin. watched Love happens. those 2 sweet guys followed us two lovely girls everywhere we went after that. awws. Ema, LOVE your hair!

tuesday : seh koh at home

wednesday : at night followed mom and sis and cousin to hair dresser. charm cut her hair, i trim my fringe, since dyed 3 strips pink. YENG. make me wanna do niaa. ish! came home keep thinking of how to hide from discipline next year.

thursday : went hair dresser again. wanted to highlight pink. but keep changing my mind. in the end i just bleach. no colour. now its light brown, 4 strips. 2 on my fringe 2 on the side. nice!

friday : slept at 6.25 am. woke up 1.35pm. haha. vern sern ask me go gurney. ok lo he come my house, we take bus there, manatau, the bus say persiaran gurney. from my place, go ka queensbay>sungai dua>greenlane>disted>general hospital>times square>komtar>NWP>Chew Thean Yang>padang polo>Sunrise>GURNEY. finally! siao wan! 1 and a half hours on the bus then only reached! 2.45 to 4.15 on the bus just to get from my house to gurney. went in late to princess and the frog. after that dunno how wann come home. Ivy drop Khai Hern and me at RamaKrishna busstop. sit there a while, then decided to walk down to PFS busstop. chun chun we reach there then bus came d. take lo. haha. go back pisa, then KH's dad fetch back to his house. thanks for the chocolate raisins, mushroom soup, corn and ferrero roche! LOVES.

thats it la this week. youth camp coming d. so not gonna update d la one week. 14th to 18th.

See how much we've grown

2009-12-11T04:46:00.006+08:00

Emanuelle Mah Thil Da

'Dralyn' Teh Ee Lyn

2007

2008

2009

Ema, Lyn, Sarah

all these years we've been through together,

has been an amazing, amazing, experience for me.

and I trust it wont end here. =)

; all the joys we had, squeezing into one toilet cubicle when we were 9

; climbing up the sides of the wall

; Ema, i still remember the SPIDER! LOL.

; our sleepover club minus the sleepovers... "Boys are cheats and liars..."

; remember how the word KISS from the song mandy was such a taboo word??

; going to ema's house. water slide! caplang rice!

; seasons in the sun! goshhh wonder how much we sucked!

; our first dance together. practice at my house

; dancing to the dvd! LOL

; "dont stop, never give up, hold your head high..."

; remember Sean? remember the snap and my nose?

; "owww, my nose! "

; then came along DRAGON, RIDER, CHICKEN, TORTOISE

; rider gang..playing with handphones

; miss calling rider from upstairs

; rider gang 1, rider gang 2.

; running out to peek at them whenever they came out of the class

; boys toilet!

; koku time! purposely walk pass that room!

; HAZEL EYES! aaaahhhhh.....

; the broom remember?!

; rider playing the piano! 7 chords.

; daily life with nuggets, and wan tan!

; "eh eh, they walk alr, come, daily life ."

; jasper kicking my leg, and i turnaround too fast, OOPS!

; My humpss/.

; Lyn, dragonn!

; Ema, Quan fong!!

; me, JAsperr!

; and of course our 'legendary' std 6 dance, Never Say Goodbye

FUN TIMES. FUN TIMES. FUN TIMES.

and yes of course there were the blunders here and there, me crying..everytime

ema, always calm.

lyn, always giving in.

I love you !

PS : sorrry we didnt take any pictures together in

2004, 2005, and 2006.

Thanks for always being there for me, besties.

BFF // huggs

Its still too soon to tell, isn't it?

2009-12-11T03:20:00.000+08:00

Now that it's all said and done,
I can't believe you were the one
To build me up and tear me down,
Like an old abandoned house.
What you said when you left
Just left me cold and out of breath.
I fell too far, was in way too deep.
Guess I let you get the best of me.

Well, I never saw it coming.
I should've started running
A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,
I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.
I'm slowly getting closure.
I guess it's really over.
I'm finally getting better.
And now I'm picking up the pieces.
I'm spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together.
'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,
I got over you.

You took a hammer to these walls,
Dragged the memories down the hall,
Packed your bags and walked away.
There was nothing I could say.
And when you slammed the front door shut,
A lot of others opened up,
So did my eyes so I could see
That you never were the best for me.

Well, I never saw it coming.
I should've started running
A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,
I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.
I'm slowly getting closure.
I guess it's really over.
I'm finally getting better.
And now I'm picking up the pieces.
I'm spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together.
'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,
I got over you.

Well, I never saw it coming.
I should've started running
A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,
I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.

Well, I never saw it coming.
I should've started running
A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,
I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.
I'm slowly getting closure.
I guess it's really over.
I'm finally getting better.
And now I'm picking up the pieces.
I'm spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together.
Well I'm putting my heart back together,
'Cause I got over you.
Well I got over you.
I got over you.
'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,
I got over you.

-Chris Daughtry

quick update

2009-11-30T11:42:00.002+08:00

21st : nothing. church
22nd : penang bridge run. almost died. came home. watched tv, with lyn. then both took a nap, bathe went dewan sri. met yen ying. change your world update at fireBrands. *crooked

23 - 25th : JYR. update soon on fireBrands. norway won.

26th : at home. almost died too. nothing to do. watched friday the 13th. hahah. jason voorhes.
27th : went queens watched new moon with ema, lyn, wei, yih, shafiya * damn cute, and yih's bro. new moon BORING. wei and shafiya cant stop squealing when jacob came out. -.- not enough action. went FOS. spent 30minutes to one hour in the dressing room with ema and lyn. haha. fun.

28th : go church
29th : queens. bought one pants one skirt.

thats about it for first week of holidays

2009-11-20T02:47:00.001+08:00

CGL is the one of the best things that has ever happened to me in my life, besides God.
i Love you guys! you make my life live-able.

2009-11-20T02:45:00.002+08:00

She better hold him tight, and know she's lucky cause...

She's got everything that i'll have to live without

-Taylor Swift.

2009-11-17T22:38:00.002+08:00

Of Cherylyn Adena Theseira's BRA and the broken tap

Cherylyn came back to school today. and yes she's the star of the story today. school oh school rocks. those ppl started to play with wet tissue. since bilik paip ada manyak sink. *Priliap!. hahaa. and somehow the tissues ended up in cherylyn's shirt. lol. and my shoe in the toilet flushing tank thingy. hahaa. then some one had some GREAT idea to dare cherylyn to tak off her lacy bra with the little heart shaped chain in the middle she's been talking about the whole day. LOL. deal this and that, finally she took it off, and hang it on the notice board. lol. then she stuffed it in her pocket went to the toilet to wear back. yun fang ini playful mia, go the next door toilet, climb up on the tap and look over the top of the wall . LOL. then 2nd to climb up on the tap nadhirah, then 3rd me, but sui sui i heavy like elephant the tap came out! lol. shoes all basah. dress all basah, run out of the toilet. half laughing half panicking. then came up with a story to tell teacher say, i go toilet, then wanna on tap time it flew out. told this story to ms teh. she believed, then all go toilet see la, the water gushing out from the lubang in the wall. all try to put back the tap head into the lubang, but cant! the water just splashes all over then yun fang dropped the tap into the toilet bowl, toilet lubang. hahaa.laughed like hell wei! thanks to MARISSA KEE PEI LING ; saviour of the day who put her hand down the toilet and took it, whooots! and started screaming for soap after that. haha. me and ms teh pulak walk round and round the toilet looking for the main tap but chui beh tiok. hahaa. so try again laa, put the tap in the hole, water not gushing d, then chun chun yun fang and nadhirah came with the cloth and plier, used it as hammer. and finally the tap stayed there. hahah. say hello to new plumbers of CGL - Nadhirah and Tan Yun Fang. hahaha. damn funny laa they all. playing with water ! come out everyone WET! all wet! hahaa. fun la dei. play more than fix! hahaa. laugh like what !

I'm deepply, deeply, disturbed.

2009-11-17T00:33:00.002+08:00

split personality? dilemma? i dont know laa.

mummy almost bought me a nokia Xpress Music 5730 just now, number + Qwerty keypad when i was in school but didnt buy la in the end, thank God, cause i dont quite like it anymore. but i was feeling a little down, coz the thought of having ONE surprise (i havent had surprise before) would be nice, the excitement, and all, then the other reasonable side of me argue, its not the right timing, the freaking phone cost more than 1000 and year end expenses so high d, not right timing, i dont quite like it anyway, my hunney 6131 still works well....see?? torn apart insidE!

then seeing all those happy couples out there, i cant help but think to myself, when will i be one of those happy couples, then i start imagining how i the perfect boyfriend would be, nice car, nice hair, nice smile , nice this and nice that, but on the other hand, i KNOW im so not ready for the roller coaster ride yet, gosssh what am i thinking??

torn apart inside. disturbed. on one hand i think my life right now is pretty simple, just me, God, family and friend. no liking anyone or what. on the other hand, its rather boring. gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

streetlamps //

2009-11-16T23:47:00.002+08:00

stepping in to the last week on school, i DREAD the coming holidays.
coz you see right go to school leh hor, every morning, set d, wake up same time, same routine, look at phone, then get up, take towel, pi zhang ek, then come out, dry hair, sit there blank awhile, then change uniform, then go out of the house, go school, walk here walk there, you know la. school. laugh here laugh there. then recess, choose something to eat, most of the time the same things. perhimpunan, go back class, after school walk out, take bus go home, bath, watch tv, online, sleep. thats all! everyday repeat toh eh liao. clothes pun no need to choose!

then now the si lang holidays come d. morning pun tak tau nak wake up what time, got what to do, stay home or go out? what time wake up, what to eat? WHAT TO WEAR. waah that one most tao hin eh. so see? HOLIDAYS SUCK MAJOR MUCH.

my love letter

2009-11-14T01:12:00.002+08:00

school rocks as usual. went to school, sat with jin fo, claudia, tiffany, yin foong, jun whey, they all. lol. laughed so much. crystal and her 18SX / SG . hhahaa. err nothing much before recess, wrote the love letter, keep kena hit by mei's bola! after recess go computer. Mr. Stanley damn funny weih!! he was singing poker face in bm. gosssh. haha. din know he was like that eh. damn funnnyyyeh! lol. rained heavily after school. got alllll wett. couldnt make it to church coz bus come late, reach home late and friday jam summore. =X

i've been thinking. and suddenly i realise i miss those times i had someone to talk to. not just any someone, that special someone. No, not a boyfriend. i miss those days, where, everyday after school i couldnt wait to go home, because i knew i had someone to talk to. i miss smiling at the phone, looking so dumb. i miss that heart fluterring feeling of liking somebody// sometimes it feels all so empty inside. like my heart has been anchored for so many months. so many unhealthy things happening, sad stuff and all, and then i look back on those times, i could just skip around the school field, squealing, never stop smiling , laughing at everything, and i miss it. miss it all too much.

No, i do not miss one particular person, i just miss having a person.

Gibber a little

2009-11-13T02:53:00.002+08:00

ed board jamuan today, err. food. nothing much. damn tired.. terletak dalam department cleaning pulak. neway, stomach not churning well, err. weather damn hot. sweat like crazy. distributed school magazines. helped the morning session. fang chi taught me photoshop basics. er. i dont know what im talking about. Danny has the love album deluxe edition! gonna get from him soon. dont know waht the balls im crapping about. blarrrggghddyy player.
not going jyr. sorry, eulene, will let you know why. gaaaah. dumb blog.

2009-11-12T21:18:00.001+08:00

Sarah is in desperate need of someone who would spare me the patience of guiding me through photoshop.

pretty pretty pleassse =D

2009-11-12T02:58:00.000+08:00

wei... how wei now?
tak tau nak blog apa. die d la my blog.
ish

2009-11-07T02:18:00.002+08:00

sorry for not posting much lately..

err.. nothing much. westlife alot..
today.. bad day. loads of things happened. loads of ppl crying, being sad, unhappy. lots of things happening.
im sorry guys, i really am...

westlife - don't cha (live face to face tour 2006)
watching nicky bryne in the video makes me go higgggh!
hot hot hot hotttayyy! whoo! dontchaaa!

lol. westlife new album - where we are, nov 30th 2009.
anyone wanna buy for me ? =)

nights ppl. watch the video!

2009-10-28T23:49:00.001+08:00

sorrry ppls! lazy to update much...

hmm....singing competition that day, dawn and i dance. dikir puteri. nice tradisional malay song.
then today nothing lo. ed board meeting 2 periods, then run around the school. play with ppl's grapes and carrots. then go kacau 2H drama practice. SORRY! xD it was fun! "we're soaring!! flyyyyiinng!!!" hahahaa.

to different person now

2009-10-23T19:36:00.002+08:00

> who was the one that said can be friends again. lemma. if really can be friends again, then we would be talking k. kk. talk to other ppl can la, comment on other ppl can la, but thisFRIEND cannot la is it. friends my pretty arse la, friends. dont say can STILL be friends, coz we freaking aint friends now. friends dont do this to friends. dao di what you want, i already did all i can, but you still treating me this way, you think i very neng shou is it. IM NOT A ROBOT!!!!!!!! i got feelings k. treat me like im what?! your shitt ar. pkm. i've had enough of ppl treating me this way! SICK of ppl treating me like im invisible, coz i aint fucking invisible. cant see me? your eyes got problem, go get some specs. le~ imagine someone do this to you, what would you feel? try think with your own brain la k. use your hati abit. dont treat certain humans like shit, coz one day ppl will treat you like shit too, you want?

Eulene, i love you, this not for you ;)

2009-10-23T00:45:00.002+08:00

i wonder.. what are friends for. define friends.
what makes you qualify as a friend of someone?
what does someone have to do to be your friend.

if the term "friends" are too shallow, then what about "good friends" or "close friends"?

what are they? how do friends treat friends?

>sigh. its so tiring, trying to be YOUR friend, but i still continue trying, because you're a great person. but its so, so tiring. i try to be close to you, i try to talk to you, but you just treat me differently, on a hierarchy, im one or two steps lower than you and your friends. i wonder why its just you. the others are fine, but i just wonder why you wont want to tell me stuffs, why you would tell everyone else, but me. am i that different? havent i done enough to deserve your trust? sometimes i feel so used, you only come to me when you need things done, but other than that, im just a shadow. its sucks, im telling you, it fcuking sucks. though it wasnt like this before, we were quite okay, then suddenly you de-ranked me to levels lower than where you are on the social ladder. i still have my friends, but i also want to be a friend of yours, who you can talk to. but no, you wont tell me stuff, you wont tell me whats going on. do you know i feel when you dont look happy? do you know, i still care. oh yeah, you probably would know, because you would hear from other ppl that i ask around about you and whats going on with you. i just dont get why, you wont talk to me. i dont get why im just your 3rd hand in work. it sucks! i try to be good friends, but you just treat me like im invisible! just because you're famous, and popular. whatever happened to when we played around? those time are gone, arent they, since you became more and more popular. gosh. i just hope that one day you will realise it. i'll still continue being your friend for now, anything you want me to help you with, i'll do it with an all willing heart, but at the same time, hoping and hoping, that one day you'll consider me a FRIEND. because friends tell friends important stuff, like you wont be coming for the reunion. recently i've given up trying to talk to you, because i know you wont talk back, but i still care, i hope you realise it one day, friend.

2009-10-20T17:12:00.002+08:00

the screaming in my head is starting again.

This is MY blog

2009-10-19T17:52:00.004+08:00

read the title. this blog happens to be mine and i have full rights to typed whatever i want, whenever i want.

so happens when i was posting the previous, "fcuked up " i was really feeling fucked up with all the crap that was typed out. i felt EXACTLY what i said i did. im SORRY im a freaking melancholy. im sorry i easily feel stuffs. im sorry i think too much. im sorry i always seem to be finding faults with myself. but thats just the way i am. and this blog is one of my main outlet. so mind my writing. if you're offended, let me know.

to . and ...... : at least have the balls to put your real name if you wanna comment. thanks

fcuked up ; i was just being very angry at myself. wondering why im now in this position. when i used to be there. didnt mean to offend anyone. i know im not normal like you all. i know im problematic and i need help. i'll admit that. my mind is tortured with my own thoughts. my moods are affected by my own mind. everything is internal. on the outside i look fine but there's a raging battle going on inside of me all the time. i can hear the screaming in my head even right now. i try to put up a strong front whenever im around you guys, all the #@$(&#@ but im still a girl on the inside. im still a weak little piece of shit that cant control my thoughts, my feelings, my actions. its agonizing. my head is always spinning around, always getting a headache,feeling as if my head is gonna blow up with all the thoughts running around. one moment i think that okay this is fine but the next, i want to commit suicide. i need help.

and writing helps me a little sometimes. so im SORRY to anyone i've offended along the way. im really sorry.

fcuked up

2009-10-13T23:34:00.006+08:00

cant have the best of both worlds. realise im not one of them anymore. its all different now isnt it. just because i dont have the same type of friends as you all. just because i mix with different types of people. just because im more chinese ed. or hokkien what ever you call. just because im not PURE like you all. just because sometimes i have problems. just because i grew up different. just because im not that into studying. just because im more playful. just because i went away for a while. just because you think it was a mistake. jsut because i think its right. just because i was trying to help my friends out. just because we have different friends. just because i do some bad stuff. just because i cant stop. just because i have feelings for people. just because i like different people than you do. just because i dont look like you. just because im not someone big in position. just because im not a favourite. just because im not influential. just because im not doing what you told me to. just because i dont know how to do it. just because just because im depressed. just because i can get emo. just because i dont have your faith. just because i have my doubts. just because i can get angry. just because i have feelings. just because i cry. just because im not happy all the time. just because i let you down. just because im not what you expect of me. just because i enjoy my life. just because you think this is all wrong. just because i speak out what i think. just because i try to be honest. just because i dowanna keep it all inside. just because i go to sleep every night thinking all these stuffs. just because i dream this. just because i wake up in the morning to the same night sky. just because .just because....just because im not like you. just because I'M NOT YOU. Just because I'M ME.

2009-10-13T00:36:00.000+08:00

Just realised I haven't thought about you lately.
I don't like you no more.

♥

Teardrops on my guitar

2009-10-13T00:29:00.000+08:00

Drew looks at me
I fake a smile so he won't see
What I want and I need
And everything that we should be

I'll bet she's beautiful
That girl he talks about
And she's got everything
That I have to live without

Drew talks to me
I laugh 'cause it's just so funny
I can't even see
Anyone when he's with me

He says he's so in love
He's finally got it right
I wonder if he knows
He's all I think about at night

He's the reason for the teardrops on my guitar
The only thing that keeps me wishing on a wishing star
He's the song in the car I keep singing
Don't know why I do

Drew walks by me
Can he tell that I can't breathe?
And there he goes, so perfectly
The kind of flawless I wish I could be

She better hold him tight
Give him all her love
Look in those beautiful eyes
And know she's lucky 'cause

He's the reason for the teardrops on my guitar
The only thing that keeps me wishing on a wishing star
He's the song in the car I keep singing
Don't know why I do

So I drive home alone
As I turn out the light
I'll put his picture down
And maybe get some sleep tonight

'Cuz he's the reason for the teardrops on my guitar
The only one who's got enough of me to break my heart
He's the song in the car I keep singing
Don't know why I do

He's the time taken up but there's never enough
And he's all that I need to fall into
Drew looks at me
I fake a smile so he won't see

2009-10-12T23:03:00.003+08:00

err, time to blog. where to start leh. hmm. my mummy merajuk-ing now. coz i say wan than mee not nice. ishh. umm exams are OVER! whoooots. lol. err. wedding last weekend, damn syok meet all the relatives, and BABY MANDA!! amanda i mean. so i cuttte!!!!!. everyone say look like me. look like i was a baby time, came home check my baby photo, really damn alike wei., photo coming soon. lol friday night dinner at ku ma's place...1 somehting ka go home. next day 6 oclock wake up. 7 go ku ma's house again, be ji mui. haha.watch the guys get played. so tired wei. haha. then came home after lunch took a nap, wake up get ready again. go dinner at Traders. so nicee. lol. amazing food. wonderful couple. neways, sat with justin, ness, sis, yee quan, nelson, pui yee, and 3 cousins who is ku cheong's brothers sons. whoooo.~~~ busy smsing that night. ada story. haha. then my prawn FLEW!. ishk. sia sui betul wei. LOL. after dinner went redbox. took da biggest room. LCD screen.Long long long couch. sing sing sin. reach home at 4. too tired wake up for church the next day. woke up lunch time went ku ma's house again. sit there the whole afternoon. waiting for baby amanda to come. she's adorable i tell you. after that came home around evening, starting to feel unwell. lol. im getting bored. haha.

congratulations to ruixin and yih liang =)

2009-10-03T02:15:00.001+08:00

back to square one ke?
damn. shouldnt have done that. ki chia!

2009-10-03T01:50:00.000+08:00

i just fell back into the deep dark pit i spent so much effort climbing a thousand miles out of.

lema, mirror rubiks gone 3 pieces.

2009-10-03T01:37:00.001+08:00

Zhong qiu jie kuai le!! sorry dunno whats it called in english,
HAPPY MOONCAKE DAY ar? XD. duno la. pek guik chap goh.! big round white moon!

yue liang yuan, yue liang....somethingg. haha

DANNY!!!! lanterns together k tomorrow!! dawn's house. hahah

2009-10-03T01:05:00.002+08:00

dun like ___ alr. now just as gooood friends, tau? dun like d, but the guan1 xin1 eh feelings is still there, as a GOOD FRIEND. =) understand?

yang perasan, janganlah terasa sangat, takkan nak cakap pasai awak. X)

2009-10-03T00:56:00.001+08:00

wanna update ar...si liao lar. cant remember anything.
er..
monday. go back school. umm duno la. tuesday pun tak tau la. my things keep flying downstairs into the rain. damn pek chek. come home, emo nia. then wednesday slept at 9.30 woke up 10.50 the next day. first time so early. but no use pun. still so tired. aih dunno la. dowanna blog d.
need to calm down now....like sesak nafas. jsut now msn too many ppl. too fast. until hard to breathe. just wanna go love my o2mania. bb.

2009-09-28T11:32:00.002+08:00

if by any chance, you still do visit my blog, i just wanna apologize with all my heart for all those offending blog posts some time back. im really sorry. i was wrong to say all those stuffs. i hope that you'll forgive me and not be angry at me anymore. wish we can still be friends like before. =)

2009-09-28T11:23:00.002+08:00

back to school .
back to school.
back to school.
back to school.
back to school.
BACK TO SCHOOL.

whooooo~ tralalallala

Beautiful beautiful song.

2009-09-27T13:58:00.004+08:00

a very meanigful song, and a beautiful video that made me cry.

the lyrics in the video are translated to english but the chinese version means so much more.

disclaimer : this song ISN'T pointed at anyone. no hard feelings

Chinese version :
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J6fn3XIJPdA&feature=related

English version :
KISS-Because I'm a girl

picture of the night

2009-09-26T04:10:00.002+08:00

ahahah! matthew!

i ♥ mooncake

2009-09-26T03:56:00.003+08:00

thank you so much! X]

Kenangan terindah

2009-09-25T17:53:00.000+08:00

Bila yang tertulis untukku
Adalah yang terbaik untukmu
Kan kujadikan kau kenangan
Yang terindah dalam hidupku
Namun takkan mudah bagiku
Meninggalkan jejak hidupku
Yang telah terukir abadi
Sebagai kenangan yang terindah

2009-09-25T16:56:00.002+08:00

Before

after

mummy's boss' cat. damn cute.

you'll never guess what was going on in this pic.

surprise belated bday / primary mini reunion

2009-09-25T15:03:00.003+08:00

title tells you what happened ytd. wheee~

yeah so it was Lyn and Wei's belated bday. hahaha, supposed to be at ema's house , but she's admitted hospital... get well soon ema! so changed to my place, waa fai ti fai ti clear up the place. lol. then the guys started coming.lol. so worried they'll get bored. LOL. but thankGod they entertained themselves. lol. who knows what they were talking and laughing so much about. lol. ying wei brought his whole collection of rubiks. can fall in love. hahaha then lyn and wei came, expecting nothing, thought just normal come my house chill watch movie, but, jeng jeng jeng, SURPRISE! sing bday song, ying wei play piano. haha then start eating lo. kena perli coz i cooked pasta.LOL. eat eat, take pictures, laugh laugh laugh, play mahjong, chor tai ti, o2mania, watch bloody valentine, eat pop corn. hahah. after most ppl went back, went outside the road with joshua, lyn and wei, ask wei keat take his ginormous bicycle come let me ride. hahah. almost fall down! lol. amazing amazing amazing day.

thanks to :
Emanuelle (even though you couldnt make it, you still helped alot! ily)
Pei Huah
Shyn Yih
Wan Wen
Matthew
Wei Keat
Ying Wei
Joshua
Heng Lin
YuHang
Yu Sheng

for helping us make the surprise a success! lol. lets meet up again some time. nyehehe.
and also thanks to matthew, wei keat and heng ling for teaching me chor tai ti. X]

gosssh, al of them change so much! LOL

By your side

2009-09-23T14:05:00.003+08:00

Put your music player on shuffle.For each question press the ‘next’ button to get your answer.You must write the name of the song down no matter what!!!

If someone says ‘Is this okay?’
You say: remember the magic by brian mcknight

["the secret of tomorrow is to live your dreams today.....you opened up my eyes to a new world.....so just remember the magic, one more time..."]

What would best describe your personality?
Poker face by lady gaga

[hahahaha. personality la dei!! haha not face]

What do you like in a guy/girl?
In the Ayer by Flo- Rida

[no comments. hahah the guy put his hands in the ayer?? lol. party into the AM ? ]

How do you feel today?
The reason by Hoobastank

["I'm not a perfect person, there's many thing i wish i didnt do...." yupss. true.]

What is your life’s purpose?
The remedy by Jason Mraz

[no comments.]

What do your friends think of you?
Never had a dream come true by S club 7

[I never had a dream come true?? gasps. the last time i did this, it was LOVE STORY, now never had a dream come true pulak]

What do you think of your parents?
Light on by David Cook

[no comments]

What do you think about very often?
anywhere but here by Hilary Duff

[true]

What is 2+2?
Kiss and sell by the maine

[i dont see the connection. XD. 2+2 = Kiss and Sell??]

What do you think of the person you like?
Let go (frou frou cover) by Boys Like Girls

[yess yess, let go...wheee~ good thing not I wanna by AAR]

What is your life story?
Its not over by Chris Daughtry

[WOW, inspiring. haha its not over]

What do you want to be when you grow up?
Single Ladies by Beyonce

[NOOOOO!!! i dowanna be a single ladie!! ]

What do you think when you see the person you like?
What makes a man by Westlife

[Tell me what makes a man.....mm hmm...true.]

What do your parents think of you?
Bring it all back by S club 7

[thanks mummy and papa!! ]

What will you dance to at your wedding?
Leave out all the rest by Linkin Park

[oh wow. emo much? haha. its a WEDDING!]

What will they play at your funeral?
A beautiful mess by Jason Mraz

[it does sound like a funeral song. but im a beautiful MESS?? cant deny.. XD]

What is your hobby/interest?
Big city dreams by Never shout never

[yeah, so dont give me bottles >.<]

What is your biggest secret?
High school musical 3 spring musical medley

[my biggest secret is ...]

What do you think of your closest friends?
Heart without a home by Westlife

[awwww....a heart without a home, a rebel without a cause...awww no!]

What should you post this as?
By your side by Tenth Avenue North

2009-09-22T19:11:00.003+08:00

waaaaa... damn Freaking sien today. urrrrggghghh. waste my time sit at home do nothing.. slept 6 am summore mummy 11.30 wake me up d. XS. go lunch come home online online online, oso SIEN i tell you.wanna sien until DIE d. then sien ka 5 oclck ballet dowanna go.......URRRRRGGGGHHthen thursday night have to go. gong lo! F@#*($&#(?@&$@#.
not i hate ballet. its just i feel i myself very STUPIAK. should have went 5 oclck class today. blergh.instead i sit home and cut cardboard untill hand swollen. stupiak scissors. XSXS

Mummmyyy~~~ buy for me! buy for me! buy for me!!!!!

2009-09-22T14:35:00.001+08:00

moments i simply ♥

2009-09-22T05:13:00.001+08:00

♥

sense number >27

2009-09-22T03:22:00.003+08:00

september 21st
still public holiday so cant go watch movie due to expensive tickets. lol. woke up around 12 something...bathed, ate lunch, online, then dad wanted to fix the shelf so went up lur, since the pieces in my room. then daddy keep fighting with me say i put wrong piece. LOL! i just sit there and tell him which piece go where, everything else, he do. hahah. then last minute saw james say on facebook bout go orphanage play with kids. ma terus sms him, haha, less than 15 minutes justin and james came and fetch me d. lol. sorrrry~~ dad!!! neway, dad fisnished the shelf, while i was at batu maung playing with little kids. lol. theyare so cute. had a good exercise la. haha. then went mcd after that. and beach. saw shiny stuff on the beach .lol. came home, high with weilynn on the phone. hahah i sound bored now. yes i am. coz im hungry and got no food to eat. TT.

2009-09-21T14:33:00.002+08:00

yesterday
wake up go church, go lunch, go home, STUDY. gosssh. i studied
hahah. tried to la. at least
4 and a half hours only 1st 2 chapters of sejarah form 2. damn . haha. study halfway then go help daddy carry up the parts of my new shelf. haha. then one piece one piece clean the dust. lol. after that daddy had to go office, so i sit there,supposed continue study but i went and buffed my nails, then ar...i also another dumb one. just ni buff ka shiny shiny then go and play with the paku for the shelf. all kena scratch. ISH. so continued studying. i think i sms more than i study. haha. daddy came back wanted to fix shelf but he said wanna watch football . MU playing live. belrgh. dun get the point of foot ball. then james called go watch G-force 9.45 with isaac and justin. isaac fetched me. go there no ticket. wait 11.45 wan, haha go play in toys r us. then sat at mcd until they wanna kam tiam oso cant. lol. Gforce ok la. one of the better disney movies lately. compared to UP. haha come home. almost 2. wanted to sleep. but terkena some troubling stuff. so sit there do other stuffs try to calm down. haha. then tido.

2009-09-20T00:17:00.000+08:00

God thank you :)
and all of you who was there with me, thanks alot too. i really needed it and i appreciate it so much :)

2009-09-18T03:11:00.002+08:00

" I think the best thing you can do right now is to find someone who can love you for who you really are. Good mood, bad mood. Ugly, pretty..." -Juno

week update

2009-09-18T01:57:00.003+08:00

*yawnssss. im very tired now. physically, and eye-ly. eye gonna close soon. since last two periods of school ad like that. =S

Monday
nothing much, rubiks gal never come, tak main rubiks too. but marissa brought 4x4x4 so play lur, do whole day do tiok one layer nia. haha. both of us sit there stare at the rubiks, as if it gonna solve itself. then ms teh lost her purse. stupiak. how old d? purse also x take care properly. ishhh. do until like wanna spotcheck nia. stupid. come home solve rubiks lur

Tuesday
marissa's problem..aih. stupiak teachers, stupiak students, come kay po. not their problem wanna make it their problem. ish. if you think you not enough problem in your life then you can have all of mine la! dun come and chui su! anyway, today woke up LATE. bus come 11.30, 11.30 only i wake up. must be because raining so x hear alarm then mummy fetch me to school jadi x ambil keys. come home after school. then only remembered. first gate ok, just climb over. after that *#$&@*($&@(#&$@*#$#@(!^(!$*@#?$^@*#^ stupid ass.ishhhkk, dowana talk about it. so kek ki. neway, manage to get my keys lur.stupiak mia. i say stupiak too many times.

Wednesday
cant remember d...remember i pick up the furry-ass dead bug. its kinda cute laa. got pattern wan the butt. then marissa took it scare sumone, tak tau who screamed very loud. haha... but its kinda big and scary looking la, but still. haha its cute! then we started cutting it up with my scissors! eeeew! cut time got like biscuit sound wan.... yerrrr... geli nya lu zai bo...then cut cut cut into pieces, wanted to see the heart and the brain. hahah. cut the head in half, then marissa use my scissors go koh the yucky sticky stuff at the butt there. gelllliiiii. oh ohh then we saw the eggs. hahaha

Thursday
slept late coz doing stuffs. then morning mornint 9.30 dawn called ask i still sleeping. haha normally i would say no i wake up d, but too tired d, terus
Dawn : Hello deii!
Sarah : hmm..helo
Dawn : wake up d ar?
Sarah : huh?
Dawn : You still sleeping zit?
Sarah : Huh? yeaah..
Dawn : oh ok la, you sleep first
Sarah : Ok.
*toink fall asleep again.
LOL. 1st time admit i still sleeping. haha sorry dawn!! lol. neway, last day of school, tiok sui. wanted to colour the fish wan mana tau dunno whose stupiak ass go lock the lock. cant open. junaidah pun takde key. waaa. really man. go all over find pin then standing there watch yunfang try pick the lock, cant work! gave up in the end. just bring the fishys back to class to colour. then nadhirah and junaidah and dawn go cut the loack, damn funny. haha. come back with thursday eh books. waa then all start rush seni. supposed draw for nadhirah but then was colouring fang's nemo. damn funny. ask fang to colour her fish she said "har??! ask me colour ar??!" XD her expression damn funny. end up she draw for nadhirah and dawn. OMG the shark damn cute!! hahaha. added one spongebob for nadhirah. haha. the shark seriously cute. hhaha. then dawn come wanted to colour, then that fangus start siao d. dawn's fish end up got one green eye and one pink eye. her nemo is yellow and brown. the whole picture damn funny. ahahah. then forced to go bilik media, go there rush the nemo thing again. then got stupiak3 kerja khusus. ishkkk. after that recess lur...no appetite. go back class, saw ppl crying..wonder what happened. must be got problem lur... i wish you all well X]science time mei chelle damn high. make us laugh like what la wei. hahaha. after that, became kinda moody...x tau y. go back .had to sweep floor, clear up the stupid mess we made just now. tak da mood d....coz sleepy i think. maths time just quiet listen to teacher. falling asleeep d. lol.post office busy. haha then after school start d.. nyehehehe. actually nad, jun, dawn and i plan wanna wet fang wan. then she found out. bluek! so change target. wanted to do mei chelle. but mei chelle and her BIGBIGBIGBIG bottle. waa crazzzzy!! man. haha. ended up she never take care her HUGE bottle properly kena i take and run then dawn ask form 1 to lam chelle. damn funny. then start running la. haha. kennnaa baikbaik . lol but not as bad as mei chelle. haha. sorrry yun fanngg!!!! poured tinge on you!! sorrry! XD. like that lur, come home, terus bathe, sit sms for one hour, then go ballet. waaaa. damn tiring!! sweat untill leotard alllll wet!!! and i hate my techniques!! all so weak. jumps also cannot jump. feet also so jelly. see ms lau jump ni, waa.so nice man! i wanna be like her!! =S come home watch tv lur. my favourite. haha. watched some stupiak show with no ending then watched The Happening. haha. kinda lame but quite chi4 ji4 lo some parts. hahah sis and i sit there "arrrr!!! coming d! coming d!!! *cover face" then papa just sit there eat his noodle so calm "dun watch la so scared". hahaha family moments. lol.

now my eyes really wanna close d. LOL.
gd night!
sorry no colours. lazzzzzyyyyy~~!!

2009-09-15T00:25:00.004+08:00

This is where I can be who I really am.
Not an angel, but not a Devil either.
No need for masks, no need for covers.
Just being who I am, it's so pleasurable.
If I'm happy, then I'm happy.
If I'm not, then there's no point keeping it inside.
I show who I am, I show what I feel.
My opinions aren't kept to myself.
I can finally speak my mind.
and NO ONE critisises or discriminates me for that.
Scream if I want to, run, jump, hide if I desire to.
Sulk if I have to, cry if it makes me feel bettter.
Even fall asleep on the table
Still no one laughs at me for that.
Do whatever I want, to my enjoyment.
Just being who I am, it's so pleasurable.

revenge

2009-09-14T19:44:00.002+08:00

4x4x4!!! whooots. lol. still doing it thought. lol. marissa bought supposed lend yunfang but that girl tak mai pulak, haha lent me. lol. waa. see oso tao hin d. lol semangat wanted to solve myself but ...waa. haha do whole day do tiok one layer oni. lol. coz 4x4x4 takda center mia. lol. crazy mann. haha. my bus finally quieten down, every one like guai guai sit in their places only one or 2 standing, and GOT PLACE FOR ME TO SIT. praise God. lol.eating some very oily weird lollipop looking chicken and very very very oily cucur now. =s

wow. i just realised we're all backstabbers, and betrayers. we all do this. go to A to talk about B, then go to B to talk about A. go to C to talk about A,B. and A,B,C sama sama talk about us behind our backs. walao. then A say to me she dun like B, but in front of B, waa do ka best fren best fren. damn geng this world. then later A tell B something ask B dun tell anyone, but B go to C tell C, and ask C not to tell anyone. isnt this already betraying? [all example]

WE ARE ALL BACKSTABBERS. dont say you're not. cause you are.

2009-09-14T11:22:00.002+08:00

I cant believe my school attendance for August was perfect.
whooo~
keeping it up for september.
and october
and november.
nyehehehe.

stomach so gastrict-y.... TT
but i wanna go school. lol

guitar geek rocks.
paradise -you are my God, rocks too.

off to school. bb

2009-09-14T01:40:00.003+08:00

updatess.

friday 11.09.09
happy birthday eulene. X)
found a book in library called -eye tricks-
whole book full of stereograms mia. haha. waaa i try to see until eye pain still cant see. lol. even yunfang can see...blek. after school mummy fetched me, followed her to evergreen hotel for seafood buffet dinner with her department ppl. waa.. the fresh salmon there tai pah. eat until wanna explode. still cant see the pictures. XS.

saturday 12.09.09
happy birthday bernard. X)
woke up saw claudia's msg.. watched the sept 11 thingy, discussing with claudia. haha. got ppl jump down from the stupid building, crazy mia.
floorball tournament...went at 1 something, picked eulene on the way. reached there at 2. mana tau found out firebrands finished playing at 11. stupid. summore kena ppl ask "what you doing here? why you come? finish d then you come" stupiak. feel like slapping him. i wanna come then my problem la. got anything to do with you ar. left around 4 went home wanted fetch mummy t5o dog show at times square, but not in time d, so sis drop me at church. ate dinner with carmen... owhh owhh!!! finally can see the picccs. haahaha so nice...! xdd after church, supper lur...sis supposed to come, wait3 still havent come. everyone finish d went off, i still there waiting... eating my char siu pao. =s

sunday 13.09.09
wake up, went traders for AOG sunday service. coz paradise ma. xdd. nice song. lol. then pastor daniel preached. so funny. lol. the way he talk so semangat. lol.tired oxo not tired d. lol. after that went buffet again at traders. blek! im gonna grow fat, mummy! stop bringing me for buffets. haha. paradise ppl ate there oso. then sis said wanted go ask for picture, but in the end dont dare. haha. bought the newest paradise album, and another older live album. come home, sleep telus. xdd. wake up watch tv, online, play guitar geek. excellent game. the best since o2jam. now wanna play again. haha

"I'm through with love..." - Mary Jane

"A life without taking chances, is no kind of life at all " -Westlife

"It's the dream afraid of waking, that never learns to dance. It's the heart afraid of breaking, that never takes a chance. " -The Rose

You're my God

I found life in You

You're the only one who came eternally

To set me free

You're my God

My life changed when your victory came to earth

So I forevermore

Will be Yours

I run to you

'cause You are the ony one

I run to you

Your love has lifted me higher

Higher than the cares of this world

When I'm with you

Your love has set me on fire

I will life my voice and praise you

'cause I love you

You are my God, yeah-eh-eah, you are my God

You reign above

Every knee will bow before You

You reign above

Every tongue confess that You are Lord

2009-09-09T00:48:00.003+08:00

"Don't give up on love, 'cause love hasn't given up on you yet" - Louis Teoh

As I watched my skin tear apart, slowly, it bled.

2009-09-09T00:33:00.006+08:00

continuing the previous post. hmm. hold on, wires connecting.

connecting....25%
connecting.....50%
connecting.....73%
connecting....97.2&
connection stalled at 97.2%

ok well so as you can see. wire conenction is not complete. which means i probably start craping halfway through. anyways. yeah kinda down mood i guess? wunt say emo, later kena again, XD.

and um yes im antilove. XD. sounds so bad but seriously. i just.....*shudders. cant take it. not only when i think of liking someone or anything, i go like "tcheah right, that youwld NEVER happen. man i dowanna go through all the heartache and headace again mann.", but even when i see other couples and all, eg my sis and bf...i have the same though "it would never work out well. she's in for trouble." mummy keep saying hava a positive outlook, but mummy, im so sorry i cant. whee~ umm yeah. my life's kinda messed up lately, ok well not lately, my life's been messed up for da past 3 fucking months. and i dont know what to do with it.sigh. at first thought it was over but nope its not. second time thought gao tim d but nopes. then now? thought finish liao but..sigh x tau la. later got this problem then that problem then another thing chut su pulak. tao hin you know. damn it man. seriously. i dowanna do anything can ar? God ar...please please i know you do best at gao tim-ing ppl's life right. can help me ar? gao tim everything, let everything run like how its supposed to be, that means like how you originally planned it, boleh? t'rima kasih manyak manyak. X)

umm..swimming never go dunno 2 or 3 weeks d... cant rmb. lol. then stopping for september... after that dunno ler..wanna take inter found. exam next year. mummy say concentrate mur on dance lur...how leh?? aih...another thing wanna tao hin now. ishhk

sigh think about school ni i wanna cry d. got 48 more days of school left only!!!! TT TT TT TT
X'C X'C X'C. sigh......school damn fun. its not just school its life. and 48 days...sigh sure pass extra fast mia. then holidays d....sien nia. what to do in holidays??? nothing to do pun. sien si wa!

i miss the pass.when i was happy.when i was in a small congregation.when i was 12.running around keong hoe.when i busy manyakmanyak with church.when i x emo.when we used to tie dragonflies with strings.when i laughed all the time. when life was just pure candy.but who says life now is bad? the pass didnt have a rubiks cube.the pass didnt have the mirror rubiks.the pass didnt have smk conventgreenlane. the pass didnt have me loving ballet somuch. the pass didnt have me sopping around.the pass didnt have me lost in my life.

2009-09-04T00:44:00.002+08:00

"Destiny is the bridge you build to the one you love." - My Sassy Girl (Hollywood Version)

someone explain the above statement to me.

current feeling : Love dun exist for me. no fairytale endings, no happy dates, no nothing. and yet i've watched 2 soppy love stories in 2 days in a row. #$@#% them. love SUCKS big time.

2009-09-03T01:15:00.003+08:00

feeling left out, uninvited, discouraged.

not part of them, not one anymore..

do i still fit in? or have i changed that much?

am i still one of you? or maybe not i guess.

am i that different from you guys? seems like it

what does language matter? i dont know.

mummy was right... can i handle this? X'C

short update

2009-09-02T22:44:00.002+08:00

friday 28.08.2009

erm.. go out lur. sien nia. say wanna go together but they ka ki disappear mia. walk here walk there. waste time. watched aliens in the attic. kinda funny lur. say yan.

saturday 29.09.2009

concert!!!! slept early wake up early gel hair..followed mummy to boss' house to feed da cat then went to mr pot for breakfast. the mocha banana sucks! then headed off to dewan....so excited!! lol. went there, take out pointe shoes, ribbon break!!! aaarrrrrrhhh!!!!! why must break today on concert day itself!! faster faster asked mummy help sew..sigh.. so scared it'll break. matt and marc came. wheee~ so long never see them d. haha. rehearsal start lur.. went through once then had lunch then go again but in soft shoes laa. haha. getting more and more nervous. then START. makeup haha.. transformation into a ghost. lol. supposed be fairy. lol. draw draw draw... no one could decide what to do for the eyeliner curls.... so end up take eyeliner pencil and tissue run around the dewan look for teacher to ask. haha. shi hun was there. waaa he concentrate on the drawing like exam. haha. and the 3 tah po hair so much glitter!!!! fairies pun bo... X'C ...after that decided lur eyeliner but guess what?? i draw wrong!!! supposed curl up i go curl down. *&#$&*@#$*@#&*$@#?($&@(#
wash off everything i've done, start all over again from foundation. X'C felt like cryinggg... sigh.... after finished everything, change and warm up. waaa. get more and more nervous. LOL. and finally..curtains open... wow that feeling when i took my first step on stage..woah...its INDESCRIBABLE. never felt anything like it before. damn. anyways whole concert went smoothly except the last dance had a little glitch but yeah. it was GREAT. sigh.. .the whole day passed so fast... X'C at night went home, quarreled with matthew.. scolded him f. sorrry!!!! i feel so badd..!!

sunday 30.08.2009

wake up terus apologise to matt. he never reply >.<>ms lau asked to meet at gurney swensens in the afternoon. went lur. haha. cun cun had to sit beside matt. haha. asked him why never reply he just smile and say "forget" ishh. haha after ok d lur. haha laugh laugh laugh in swensens. Ms Lau and Mrs Lau *daughter and mummy treated us all to ice creammm! wheee~ [pics on facebook]. had so much fun. after everyone went back, went Dome to eat with yy and eunice. at night go home made up with matt d.. whee~ haha love youu!!

monday 31.08.2009

matt smsed me at 7.36 in the morning!! still sleeping la dei! haha asked whether wanna go out. with marc and yen ying. penang so small oso 4 ppl cant decide where to go. spend da whole morning discussing. lol. matt said 11.30 fetch me but mana tau 12.45 ni come. should have slept longer. sien nia wait for them. almost fell asleep. lol. had time to quarrel with ppl summore they still havent come. lol. ended up going to BJ. went bowling. haha so scared laa. scared my fingers drop off. lol. but it was fun laa. hahaha. played pool after that too. then matt drop us home lur..marc drove. haha. matt more stable driving. XD. sigh they go back kl d.... X'C

2009-08-31T03:13:00.001+08:00

picture of the day // ♥

marcus ; shi hun ; matthew

2009-08-31T01:55:00.001+08:00

i absolutely absolutely absolutely absolutely absolutely absolutely absolutely absolutely absolutely absolutely absolutely HATE being a Sanguine Melancholy!!!!!!!!!!!
URGH!

2009-08-28T00:14:00.002+08:00

14 Solok Mahsuri 5 ; Carbonara

change place today come my house. XD. lyn wanted spaghetti. she brought 20 sausages and our chocolate chip cookiesss. hehehe... then cooked lur. keep forgetting to put this and that. XD. emanuelle and i went out to buy the cheese and spaghetti noodles. gosh, never bring ema out to a supermarket man! she bought a whole can of whipped cream! and ate it just like that! bluek!!! jeelat! XD. cooked finished. we were supposed to watch My Bloody Valentine mia...but they all all so damn scared, ended up watching Over Her Dead Body and Mr and Mrs Smith. haha ate more choc chip cookies though. haha. at night go ballet. same la. haha. i sound boring....XS sorry...takda mood now. damn. so tired summore have to wash hair and wait for it to dry. X'C

2009-08-27T23:30:00.002+08:00

same place ; different day

went to emanuelle's house again. stupid digi cant use. supposed meet huah at 1.30 but we couldnt contact her and she didnt know where ema's house is so she went and waited at badminton court till 2.30 when we decided to go down and look for her. shout the whole N-park. "huah!!! where are you??!" LOL. sorry afternoon nap ppls!! XD neways, huah was already waiting for 1 hour plus and we were in the room eating chocolate chip cookies. damn. sorrry!!!! huah, lyn and wei played lur... ema and i just sit there watch. concert coming d..dare not playXD later muscle ache toh cham liao. haha. then went to da roof top balcony snapped lotsa pics..haha. ma like that lur... after that went ballet....till 12... nothing much la. haha

huah , one word, YENG.

2009-08-27T19:41:00.003+08:00

the final moments ; wish it would never end

*screams last concert practice in 45 mintues! the last 2 hours of practice...aih.... im so nervous..! feel like im not ready enough.. keep messing up the shasay pas de bure [duno how to spell] part...! and the jetes...grrrr.... i wanna spend the whole of tonight and tomorrow at da studio...!

Ms Laaauuuuu..........!!!!!!!

2009-08-26T02:25:00.004+08:00

standard 3 all over again ; except that this time we had cameras

funn dayy. wheee. wke up at 11. bathe, online. mummy came fetch me to ♥ema's house. when i reached ema and family havent eaten lunch. felt so weird, i sit on the sofa, and they eating dinner there. haha then ♥wei came, and 3 of us sat in ema's room for 1 hour plus for ♥lyn to come at 3.talk about guys, talk about girls, talk about gay, tak about les, talk about school, talk about everything. so long never meet d ler!! then ki siao in the room. i started playing with ema's smile shutter. damn coool. *smileee..! then SNAP! haha. we drew a smiley on paper and tried with that but didnt work. tried with the koko crunch box oxo x work. haha conclusion : smile shutter only detect human smiles. XD. but how it noe its human leh?? XD then ema called -5161-... kap siao. haha cant even understand a word -5161- is saying. only ema can understand. -5161- said i sound like ema's mom! bluek XP hot voice. haha. ♥lyn finally came then we went swimming. haha. siao. from ground floor shout to 12th floor ask ema's dad bring her phone down.then we started snapping lotsa picturess. haha. damn crazy. go all around the N-Park pool area snapping pictures. haha. ki siao with da camera. lol. ema's phone died d, we went upstairs take lyn, wei and my phone down, continue snap snap snap. lol. 3smth till 6 smth finally decided went back to ema's house, terus makan. too hungry d. eggs, beans and sausages. ema's dad sliced 2 big tomatoes ask us to finish. but all of them dun eat tomatoes de! ended up i ate both tomatoes. gosh! its nice k....haha i think i look like a tomato now. haha. we changed, then wei went back d... left lyn, ema and me sit there so tired, transfering pictures.lol. dinner couldnt eat much, still full from da eggs and TOMATOES. after that lyn's mom came d. around 9.. they on the way back dropped me at ballet school. waaah.. so tired,eyes can hardly open. haha. practice till 12. everyone abit stim stim but still can talk until cant even hear the music. and shi hun, dunno why extra semangat mia. haha like on drugs. jumping around like damn high. haha. XDXD. came home ler after that.....boil more egss and eat. haha.

tomorrow meeting ♥huah!! i cant wait >.<

2009-08-25T01:07:00.006+08:00

sore feet ; sore toes ; sore ankles

sigh. stayed up last night sewing the sequins until 5 smth..then delete msgs till 6am, terus Splat. but cldnt sleep coz keep worrrying bout skirt havent done. supposed wanted to wake up 12 smth mia then cun cun in time to bathe tie hair make up. but 10 smth woke up d. sew sew sew finally finish. went out for lunch then went and buy gel, pins, liquid eyeliner*mine dried up already.X) go home start lur. bathe, tie hair..make up...my bun smaller now, wheee. hahah. in2it eyeliner rocks. easy to use and wont smear mia. nice. haha finish everything, took some pictures and sent to mei chelle coz she wanted to see. lol. i looked like ghost and she said its cute. XD, left house like round 4.40, reach cun cun 5.00pm. dewan sri pinang. not many ppl around yet. dr.lee and the stage crew still gao tim-ing the stage marking and everything. ms lau doing costumes. i was the only fairy that went ready with makeup and hair. XP. others all still doing. lol. thought yesterday at studio time already agree all wanna do makeup mia, but ...haha. played around with Julia's Lumix. heee... so funn!! snap snap snap piccs of ppl doing stuffs. all the weird expressions. XD. went on stage tried out the ???? sheet the pun on the stage. damn hard to use!! its so siap, too rough d..almost fell a few times when on pointe. not on pointe oso hard to balance. stupiak floor. sia sui me. then first run start withuot lighting. ok lur...had to watched out spacing coz gota space with da lights. then had a 15 minute break. thought got sausage bun to eat, but guess what?? the little kids ate it all!! and i didnt get my sausage bun! X'C so dissapointed. 2nd run started, lights and music, like real day. haha. nice laa. haha. the lights damn hot. lol. i think can fry egg d. lol.finished abit early than supposed too, but thats good right. haha. pack up lur..saw 10 bucks on the floor beside my makeup bag. i terus shouted "10bucks!! i found 10 bucks!!" hahah. wanted to give ms lau mia, but she said i found it so i should keep it. hahaha so im 10 bucks richer!!! muahahaha.

went dinner, came home, made some calls, arrange wednesday and thursday plans. haha. called ♥huah....she was so excited, she couldnt even talk properly, was like shouting " hey yo long time no chat man!!!" haha. and she speaked english with me >.<" meeting up with ♥ema , ♥lyn and ♥wei tomorrow. then gonna meet up again but with ♥huah too on wednesday. wheeee ~ friday go out with ♥yih, ♥lyn, ♥wei, ♥huah i think, and ♥dragon they all. yayy. haha. so long never met them d. lol. miss them so muchhh. hahah

"today has gone, just to wait for tomorrow"

i miss CGL!! X'C

appreciations

2009-08-24T05:22:00.002+08:00

thanks to...

♥ Boys Like Girls

All Time Low

The Offspring

There For Tomorrow

The Maine

All American Rejects

We The Kings

Jeremy Kuan >.<

for accompanying me through this long night of threading stupid needles and poking myself with them.