if by any chance, you still do visit my blog, i just wanna apologize with all my heart for all those offending blog posts some time back. im really sorry. i was wrong to say all those stuffs. i hope that you'll forgive me and not be angry at me anymore. wish we can still be friends like before. =)

back to school .
back to school.
back to school.
back to school.
back to school.
BACK TO SCHOOL.

whooooo~ tralalallala

Beautiful beautiful song.

a very meanigful song, and a beautiful video that made me cry.

the lyrics in the video are translated to english but the chinese version means so much more.

disclaimer : this song ISN'T pointed at anyone. no hard feelings

Chinese version :
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J6fn3XIJPdA&feature=related


English version :
KISS-Because I'm a girl

picture of the night

ahahah! matthew!

i ♥ mooncake

thank you so much! X]

Kenangan terindah

Bila yang tertulis untukku
Adalah yang terbaik untukmu
Kan kujadikan kau kenangan
Yang terindah dalam hidupku
Namun takkan mudah bagiku
Meninggalkan jejak hidupku
Yang telah terukir abadi
Sebagai kenangan yang terindah

Before

after

mummy's boss' cat. damn cute.

you'll never guess what was going on in this pic.

surprise belated bday / primary mini reunion

title tells you what happened ytd. wheee~

yeah so it was Lyn and Wei's belated bday. hahaha, supposed to be at ema's house , but she's admitted hospital... get well soon ema! so changed to my place, waa fai ti fai ti clear up the place. lol. then the guys started coming.lol. so worried they'll get bored. LOL. but thankGod they entertained themselves. lol. who knows what they were talking and laughing so much about. lol. ying wei brought his whole collection of rubiks. can fall in love. hahaha then lyn and wei came, expecting nothing, thought just normal come my house chill watch movie, but, jeng jeng jeng, SURPRISE! sing bday song, ying wei play piano. haha then start eating lo. kena perli coz i cooked pasta.LOL. eat eat, take pictures, laugh laugh laugh, play mahjong, chor tai ti, o2mania, watch bloody valentine, eat pop corn. hahah. after most ppl went back, went outside the road with joshua, lyn and wei, ask wei keat take his ginormous bicycle come let me ride. hahah. almost fall down! lol. amazing amazing amazing day.

thanks to :
Emanuelle (even though you couldnt make it, you still helped alot! ily)
Pei Huah
Shyn Yih
Wan Wen
Matthew
Wei Keat
Ying Wei
Joshua
Heng Lin
YuHang
Yu Sheng

for helping us make the surprise a success! lol. lets meet up again some time. nyehehe.
and also thanks to matthew, wei keat and heng ling for teaching me chor tai ti. X]

gosssh, al of them change so much! LOL

By your side

Put your music player on shuffle.For each question press the ‘next’ button to get your answer.You must write the name of the song down no matter what!!!

If someone says ‘Is this okay?’
You say: remember the magic by brian mcknight

["the secret of tomorrow is to live your dreams today.....you opened up my eyes to a new world.....so just remember the magic, one more time..."]

What would best describe your personality?
Poker face by lady gaga

[hahahaha. personality la dei!! haha not face]

What do you like in a guy/girl?
In the Ayer by Flo- Rida

[no comments. hahah the guy put his hands in the ayer?? lol. party into the AM ? ]

How do you feel today?
The reason by Hoobastank

["I'm not a perfect person, there's many thing i wish i didnt do...." yupss. true.]

What is your life’s purpose?
The remedy by Jason Mraz

[no comments.]

What do your friends think of you?
Never had a dream come true by S club 7

[I never had a dream come true?? gasps. the last time i did this, it was LOVE STORY, now never had a dream come true pulak]

What do you think of your parents?
Light on by David Cook

[no comments]

What do you think about very often?
anywhere but here by Hilary Duff

[true]

What is 2+2?
Kiss and sell by the maine

[i dont see the connection. XD. 2+2 = Kiss and Sell??]

What do you think of the person you like?
Let go (frou frou cover) by Boys Like Girls

[yess yess, let go...wheee~ good thing not I wanna by AAR]

What is your life story?
Its not over by Chris Daughtry

[WOW, inspiring. haha its not over]

What do you want to be when you grow up?
Single Ladies by Beyonce

[NOOOOO!!! i dowanna be a single ladie!! ]

What do you think when you see the person you like?
What makes a man by Westlife

[Tell me what makes a man.....mm hmm...true.]

What do your parents think of you?
Bring it all back by S club 7

[thanks mummy and papa!! ]

What will you dance to at your wedding?
Leave out all the rest by Linkin Park

[oh wow. emo much? haha. its a WEDDING!]

What will they play at your funeral?
A beautiful mess by Jason Mraz

[it does sound like a funeral song. but im a beautiful MESS?? cant deny.. XD]

What is your hobby/interest?
Big city dreams by Never shout never

[yeah, so dont give me bottles >.<]

What is your biggest secret?
High school musical 3 spring musical medley

[my biggest secret is ...]

What do you think of your closest friends?
Heart without a home by Westlife

[awwww....a heart without a home, a rebel without a cause...awww no!]

What should you post this as?
By your side by Tenth Avenue North

waaaaa... damn Freaking sien today. urrrrggghghh. waste my time sit at home do nothing.. slept 6 am summore mummy 11.30 wake me up d. XS. go lunch come home online online online, oso SIEN i tell you.wanna sien until DIE d. then sien ka 5 oclck ballet dowanna go.......URRRRRGGGGHHthen thursday night have to go. gong lo! F@#*($&#(?@&$@#.
not i hate ballet. its just i feel i myself very STUPIAK. should have went 5 oclck class today. blergh.instead i sit home and cut cardboard untill hand swollen. stupiak scissors. XSXS

Mummmyyy~~~ buy for me! buy for me! buy for me!!!!!

moments i simply ♥

♥

sense number >27

september 21st
still public holiday so cant go watch movie due to expensive tickets. lol. woke up around 12 something...bathed, ate lunch, online, then dad wanted to fix the shelf so went up lur, since the pieces in my room. then daddy keep fighting with me say i put wrong piece. LOL! i just sit there and tell him which piece go where, everything else, he do. hahah. then last minute saw james say on facebook bout go orphanage play with kids. ma terus sms him, haha, less than 15 minutes justin and james came and fetch me d. lol. sorrrry~~ dad!!! neway, dad fisnished the shelf, while i was at batu maung playing with little kids. lol. theyare so cute. had a good exercise la. haha. then went mcd after that. and beach. saw shiny stuff on the beach .lol. came home, high with weilynn on the phone. hahah i sound bored now. yes i am. coz im hungry and got no food to eat. TT.

yesterday
wake up go church, go lunch, go home, STUDY. gosssh. i studied
hahah. tried to la. at least
4 and a half hours only 1st 2 chapters of sejarah form 2. damn . haha. study halfway then go help daddy carry up the parts of my new shelf. haha. then one piece one piece clean the dust. lol. after that daddy had to go office, so i sit there,supposed continue study but i went and buffed my nails, then ar...i also another dumb one. just ni buff ka shiny shiny then go and play with the paku for the shelf. all kena scratch. ISH. so continued studying. i think i sms more than i study. haha. daddy came back wanted to fix shelf but he said wanna watch football . MU playing live. belrgh. dun get the point of foot ball. then james called go watch G-force 9.45 with isaac and justin. isaac fetched me. go there no ticket. wait 11.45 wan, haha go play in toys r us. then sat at mcd until they wanna kam tiam oso cant. lol. Gforce ok la. one of the better disney movies lately. compared to UP. haha come home. almost 2. wanted to sleep. but terkena some troubling stuff. so sit there do other stuffs try to calm down. haha. then tido.

God thank you :)
and all of you who was there with me, thanks alot too. i really needed it and i appreciate it so much :)

" I think the best thing you can do right now is to find someone who can love you for who you really are. Good mood, bad mood. Ugly, pretty..." -Juno

week update

*yawnssss. im very tired now. physically, and eye-ly. eye gonna close soon. since last two periods of school ad like that. =S

Monday
nothing much, rubiks gal never come, tak main rubiks too. but marissa brought 4x4x4 so play lur, do whole day do tiok one layer nia. haha. both of us sit there stare at the rubiks, as if it gonna solve itself. then ms teh lost her purse. stupiak. how old d? purse also x take care properly. ishhh. do until like wanna spotcheck nia. stupid. come home solve rubiks lur

Tuesday
marissa's problem..aih. stupiak teachers, stupiak students, come kay po. not their problem wanna make it their problem. ish. if you think you not enough problem in your life then you can have all of mine la! dun come and chui su! anyway, today woke up LATE. bus come 11.30, 11.30 only i wake up. must be because raining so x hear alarm then mummy fetch me to school jadi x ambil keys. come home after school. then only remembered. first gate ok, just climb over. after that *#$&@*($&@(#&$@*#$#@(!^(!$*@#?$^@*#^ stupid ass.ishhhkk, dowana talk about it. so kek ki. neway, manage to get my keys lur.stupiak mia. i say stupiak too many times.

Wednesday
cant remember d...remember i pick up the furry-ass dead bug. its kinda cute laa. got pattern wan the butt. then marissa took it scare sumone, tak tau who screamed very loud. haha... but its kinda big and scary looking la, but still. haha its cute! then we started cutting it up with my scissors! eeeew! cut time got like biscuit sound wan.... yerrrr... geli nya lu zai bo...then cut cut cut into pieces, wanted to see the heart and the brain. hahah. cut the head in half, then marissa use my scissors go koh the yucky sticky stuff at the butt there. gelllliiiii. oh ohh then we saw the eggs. hahaha

Thursday
slept late coz doing stuffs. then morning mornint 9.30 dawn called ask i still sleeping. haha normally i would say no i wake up d, but too tired d, terus
Dawn : Hello deii!
Sarah : hmm..helo
Dawn : wake up d ar?
Sarah : huh?
Dawn : You still sleeping zit?
Sarah : Huh? yeaah..
Dawn : oh ok la, you sleep first
Sarah : Ok.
*toink fall asleep again.
LOL. 1st time admit i still sleeping. haha sorry dawn!! lol. neway, last day of school, tiok sui. wanted to colour the fish wan mana tau dunno whose stupiak ass go lock the lock. cant open. junaidah pun takde key. waaa. really man. go all over find pin then standing there watch yunfang try pick the lock, cant work! gave up in the end. just bring the fishys back to class to colour. then nadhirah and junaidah and dawn go cut the loack, damn funny. haha. come back with thursday eh books. waa then all start rush seni. supposed draw for nadhirah but then was colouring fang's nemo. damn funny. ask fang to colour her fish she said "har??! ask me colour ar??!" XD her expression damn funny. end up she draw for nadhirah and dawn. OMG the shark damn cute!! hahaha. added one spongebob for nadhirah. haha. the shark seriously cute. hhaha. then dawn come wanted to colour, then that fangus start siao d. dawn's fish end up got one green eye and one pink eye. her nemo is yellow and brown. the whole picture damn funny. ahahah. then forced to go bilik media, go there rush the nemo thing again. then got stupiak3 kerja khusus. ishkkk. after that recess lur...no appetite. go back class, saw ppl crying..wonder what happened. must be got problem lur... i wish you all well X]science time mei chelle damn high. make us laugh like what la wei. hahaha. after that, became kinda moody...x tau y. go back .had to sweep floor, clear up the stupid mess we made just now. tak da mood d....coz sleepy i think. maths time just quiet listen to teacher. falling asleeep d. lol.post office busy. haha then after school start d.. nyehehehe. actually nad, jun, dawn and i plan wanna wet fang wan. then she found out. bluek! so change target. wanted to do mei chelle. but mei chelle and her BIGBIGBIGBIG bottle. waa crazzzzy!! man. haha. ended up she never take care her HUGE bottle properly kena i take and run then dawn ask form 1 to lam chelle. damn funny. then start running la. haha. kennnaa baikbaik . lol but not as bad as mei chelle. haha. sorrry yun fanngg!!!! poured tinge on you!! sorrry! XD. like that lur, come home, terus bathe, sit sms for one hour, then go ballet. waaaa. damn tiring!! sweat untill leotard alllll wet!!! and i hate my techniques!! all so weak. jumps also cannot jump. feet also so jelly. see ms lau jump ni, waa.so nice man! i wanna be like her!! =S come home watch tv lur. my favourite. haha. watched some stupiak show with no ending then watched The Happening. haha. kinda lame but quite chi4 ji4 lo some parts. hahah sis and i sit there "arrrr!!! coming d! coming d!!! *cover face" then papa just sit there eat his noodle so calm "dun watch la so scared". hahaha family moments. lol.

now my eyes really wanna close d. LOL.
gd night!
sorry no colours. lazzzzzyyyyy~~!!

This is where I can be who I really am.
Not an angel, but not a Devil either.
No need for masks, no need for covers.
Just being who I am, it's so pleasurable.
If I'm happy, then I'm happy.
If I'm not, then there's no point keeping it inside.
I show who I am, I show what I feel.
My opinions aren't kept to myself.
I can finally speak my mind.
and NO ONE critisises or discriminates me for that.
Scream if I want to, run, jump, hide if I desire to.
Sulk if I have to, cry if it makes me feel bettter.
Even fall asleep on the table
Still no one laughs at me for that.
Do whatever I want, to my enjoyment.
Just being who I am, it's so pleasurable.

revenge

4x4x4!!! whooots. lol. still doing it thought. lol. marissa bought supposed lend yunfang but that girl tak mai pulak, haha lent me. lol. waa. see oso tao hin d. lol semangat wanted to solve myself but ...waa. haha do whole day do tiok one layer oni. lol. coz 4x4x4 takda center mia. lol. crazy mann. haha. my bus finally quieten down, every one like guai guai sit in their places only one or 2 standing, and GOT PLACE FOR ME TO SIT. praise God. lol.eating some very oily weird lollipop looking chicken and very very very oily cucur now. =s




wow. i just realised we're all backstabbers, and betrayers. we all do this. go to A to talk about B, then go to B to talk about A. go to C to talk about A,B. and A,B,C sama sama talk about us behind our backs. walao. then A say to me she dun like B, but in front of B, waa do ka best fren best fren. damn geng this world. then later A tell B something ask B dun tell anyone, but B go to C tell C, and ask C not to tell anyone. isnt this already betraying? [all example]

WE ARE ALL BACKSTABBERS. dont say you're not. cause you are.

I cant believe my school attendance for August was perfect.
whooo~
keeping it up for september.
and october
and november.
nyehehehe.


stomach so gastrict-y.... TT
but i wanna go school. lol

guitar geek rocks.
paradise -you are my God, rocks too.

off to school. bb

updatess.

friday 11.09.09
happy birthday eulene. X)
found a book in library called -eye tricks-
whole book full of stereograms mia. haha. waaa i try to see until eye pain still cant see. lol. even yunfang can see...blek. after school mummy fetched me, followed her to evergreen hotel for seafood buffet dinner with her department ppl. waa.. the fresh salmon there tai pah. eat until wanna explode. still cant see the pictures. XS.

saturday 12.09.09
happy birthday bernard. X)
woke up saw claudia's msg.. watched the sept 11 thingy, discussing with claudia. haha. got ppl jump down from the stupid building, crazy mia.
floorball tournament...went at 1 something, picked eulene on the way. reached there at 2. mana tau found out firebrands finished playing at 11. stupid. summore kena ppl ask "what you doing here? why you come? finish d then you come" stupiak. feel like slapping him. i wanna come then my problem la. got anything to do with you ar. left around 4 went home wanted fetch mummy t5o dog show at times square, but not in time d, so sis drop me at church. ate dinner with carmen... owhh owhh!!! finally can see the picccs. haahaha so nice...! xdd after church, supper lur...sis supposed to come, wait3 still havent come. everyone finish d went off, i still there waiting... eating my char siu pao. =s

sunday 13.09.09
wake up, went traders for AOG sunday service. coz paradise ma. xdd. nice song. lol. then pastor daniel preached. so funny. lol. the way he talk so semangat. lol.tired oxo not tired d. lol. after that went buffet again at traders. blek! im gonna grow fat, mummy! stop bringing me for buffets. haha. paradise ppl ate there oso. then sis said wanted go ask for picture, but in the end dont dare. haha. bought the newest paradise album, and another older live album. come home, sleep telus. xdd. wake up watch tv, online, play guitar geek. excellent game. the best since o2jam. now wanna play again. haha

"I'm through with love..." - Mary Jane

"A life without taking chances, is no kind of life at all " -Westlife

"It's the dream afraid of waking, that never learns to dance. It's the heart afraid of breaking, that never takes a chance. " -The Rose

You're my God

I found life in You

You're the only one who came eternally

To set me free

You're my God

My life changed when your victory came to earth

So I forevermore

Will be Yours

I run to you

'cause You are the ony one

I run to you

Your love has lifted me higher

Higher than the cares of this world

When I'm with you

Your love has set me on fire

I will life my voice and praise you

'cause I love you

You are my God, yeah-eh-eah, you are my God

You are my God, yeah-eh-eah, you are my God

You reign above

Every knee will bow before You

You reign above

Every tongue confess that You are Lord

"Don't give up on love, 'cause love hasn't given up on you yet" - Louis Teoh

As I watched my skin tear apart, slowly, it bled.

continuing the previous post. hmm. hold on, wires connecting.

connecting....25%
connecting.....50%
connecting.....73%
connecting....97.2&
connection stalled at 97.2%

ok well so as you can see. wire conenction is not complete. which means i probably start craping halfway through. anyways. yeah kinda down mood i guess? wunt say emo, later kena again, XD.

and um yes im antilove. XD. sounds so bad but seriously. i just.....*shudders. cant take it. not only when i think of liking someone or anything, i go like "tcheah right, that youwld NEVER happen. man i dowanna go through all the heartache and headace again mann.", but even when i see other couples and all, eg my sis and bf...i have the same though "it would never work out well. she's in for trouble." mummy keep saying hava a positive outlook, but mummy, im so sorry i cant. whee~ umm yeah. my life's kinda messed up lately, ok well not lately, my life's been messed up for da past 3 fucking months. and i dont know what to do with it.sigh. at first thought it was over but nope its not. second time thought gao tim d but nopes. then now? thought finish liao but..sigh x tau la. later got this problem then that problem then another thing chut su pulak. tao hin you know. damn it man. seriously. i dowanna do anything can ar? God ar...please please i know you do best at gao tim-ing ppl's life right. can help me ar? gao tim everything, let everything run like how its supposed to be, that means like how you originally planned it, boleh? t'rima kasih manyak manyak. X)

umm..swimming never go dunno 2 or 3 weeks d... cant rmb. lol. then stopping for september... after that dunno ler..wanna take inter found. exam next year. mummy say concentrate mur on dance lur...how leh?? aih...another thing wanna tao hin now. ishhk

sigh think about school ni i wanna cry d. got 48 more days of school left only!!!! TT TT TT TT
X'C X'C X'C. sigh......school damn fun. its not just school its life. and 48 days...sigh sure pass extra fast mia. then holidays d....sien nia. what to do in holidays??? nothing to do pun. sien si wa!








i miss the pass.when i was happy.when i was in a small congregation.when i was 12.running around keong hoe.when i busy manyakmanyak with church.when i x emo.when we used to tie dragonflies with strings.when i laughed all the time. when life was just pure candy.but who says life now is bad? the pass didnt have a rubiks cube.the pass didnt have the mirror rubiks.the pass didnt have smk conventgreenlane. the pass didnt have me loving ballet somuch. the pass didnt have me sopping around.the pass didnt have me lost in my life.

"Destiny is the bridge you build to the one you love." - My Sassy Girl (Hollywood Version)

someone explain the above statement to me.

current feeling : Love dun exist for me. no fairytale endings, no happy dates, no nothing. and yet i've watched 2 soppy love stories in 2 days in a row. #$@#% them. love SUCKS big time.

feeling left out, uninvited, discouraged.

not part of them, not one anymore..

do i still fit in? or have i changed that much?

am i still one of you? or maybe not i guess.

am i that different from you guys? seems like it

what does language matter? i dont know.

mummy was right... can i handle this? X'C

short update

friday 28.08.2009

erm.. go out lur. sien nia. say wanna go together but they ka ki disappear mia. walk here walk there. waste time. watched aliens in the attic. kinda funny lur. say yan.

saturday 29.09.2009

concert!!!! slept early wake up early gel hair..followed mummy to boss' house to feed da cat then went to mr pot for breakfast. the mocha banana sucks! then headed off to dewan....so excited!! lol. went there, take out pointe shoes, ribbon break!!! aaarrrrrrhhh!!!!! why must break today on concert day itself!! faster faster asked mummy help sew..sigh.. so scared it'll break. matt and marc came. wheee~ so long never see them d. haha. rehearsal start lur.. went through once then had lunch then go again but in soft shoes laa. haha. getting more and more nervous. then START. makeup haha.. transformation into a ghost. lol. supposed be fairy. lol. draw draw draw... no one could decide what to do for the eyeliner curls.... so end up take eyeliner pencil and tissue run around the dewan look for teacher to ask. haha. shi hun was there. waaa he concentrate on the drawing like exam. haha. and the 3 tah po hair so much glitter!!!! fairies pun bo... X'C ...after that decided lur eyeliner but guess what?? i draw wrong!!! supposed curl up i go curl down. *&#$&*@#$*@#&*$@#?($&@(#
wash off everything i've done, start all over again from foundation. X'C felt like cryinggg... sigh.... after finished everything, change and warm up. waaa. get more and more nervous. LOL. and finally..curtains open... wow that feeling when i took my first step on stage..woah...its INDESCRIBABLE. never felt anything like it before. damn. anyways whole concert went smoothly except the last dance had a little glitch but yeah. it was GREAT. sigh.. .the whole day passed so fast... X'C at night went home, quarreled with matthew.. scolded him f. sorrry!!!! i feel so badd..!!

sunday 30.08.2009

wake up terus apologise to matt. he never reply >.<>ms lau asked to meet at gurney swensens in the afternoon. went lur. haha. cun cun had to sit beside matt. haha. asked him why never reply he just smile and say "forget" ishh. haha after ok d lur. haha laugh laugh laugh in swensens. Ms Lau and Mrs Lau *daughter and mummy treated us all to ice creammm! wheee~ [pics on facebook]. had so much fun. after everyone went back, went Dome to eat with yy and eunice. at night go home made up with matt d.. whee~ haha love youu!!

monday 31.08.2009

matt smsed me at 7.36 in the morning!! still sleeping la dei! haha asked whether wanna go out. with marc and yen ying. penang so small oso 4 ppl cant decide where to go. spend da whole morning discussing. lol. matt said 11.30 fetch me but mana tau 12.45 ni come. should have slept longer. sien nia wait for them. almost fell asleep. lol. had time to quarrel with ppl summore they still havent come. lol. ended up going to BJ. went bowling. haha so scared laa. scared my fingers drop off. lol. but it was fun laa. hahaha. played pool after that too. then matt drop us home lur..marc drove. haha. matt more stable driving. XD. sigh they go back kl d.... X'C